Knock knock, Who's there? The police, you have committed 14 major felonies and you are being arrested.

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Why are Jewish men circumcised? Because it is the norm with that particular religious group to circumcise male infants shortly after birth.

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How do you kill a zombie? You don't. Zombies aren't real.

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What is the only day of the year when you're guaranteed to find me? The day I kill you.

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pauls tuck

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I mustache you a question. But I'll shave it for later.

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Sometimes I stare at a Frisbee and wonder why it is getting bigger. Then, it hits me.

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What can be said about a high school drop out who is 30, lives with his mom, and plays WoW all day? He is probably a very high level mage

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whats a diffrence between a bench and a black person the bench is a thing a black person is a human being

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Q. What's the difference between a Mcdonalds employee and a gynecologist? A. They have different jobs.

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When is a door not a door? Never, a door is an inanimate object and is thus incapable of transforming.

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What do you call a mexican man working at a Taco Bell? A young man freshly out of high-school, who could not get into college because his family is sadly struck with poverty. He also has a baby on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection when having relations with his girlfriend while he was intoxicated. I wish him the best of luck!

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A Jehovah's Witness knocks on my door. I didn't answer the door.

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sally has no arms knock knock who's there not sally

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what did the homeless man get for christmas.......................nothing

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Real Joke: The US Air Force operates Seymour Johnson Air Force Base. It is named for a seaman. Go look it up.

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What's the best part of any family reunion? Sodomy.

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What is the anwer to life? (>^v^ )> KIRBY DANCE

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Do you like fishsticks No

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what do you get if you put a baby in a microwave? an erection

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What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

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what types of people have big noses? people whose parents both carried the recesive gene.

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What's the difference between a baby and an onion? One is a vegetable and the other is a human being.

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How do you put a bananna in a mini-van? Walk up to the mini-van and stick it in the backseat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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