It's green, has four legs and sits in a tree. And if it falls on your head you're dead. A billiard table.

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Why did the blonde walk into the men's restroom? Because the blonde was a man who needed to expel his feculent waste.

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What did the world's greatest bowler say when he got a gutterball? "Spare me the irony!" Get it? It's because he's made of metal.

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What did the teenage girl get for just sweet 16? An abortion

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roses are red, violets are blue, my son is gay, f**k my life...

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What do you call a rich black man? A auntrapanour who simply enjoys making more money than any average person

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knock knock whose there? i don't know...

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What do you call a woman outside of the kitchen? Out of place.

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Wanna hear a joke? Your contact list.

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What's similar about a mole and an eagle? They both are blind and dig through the ground. Except the eagle.

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape

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Why was the boy running There was a giraffe chasing him

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This couple is having the most passionate sex ever one night, and the guy cums before he gets a chance to pull out. He gets the woman pregnant. Now they are married.

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What does a jew to enter in a movie theater? He buys a ticket!

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Q: Why did Susan fall off the swings? A: She had no arms Q: Why did no one help her up? A: She had no friends Q: why was she at the play ground? A: Her parents were fighting again Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susan

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What's short and weak and has no life..........a Jordan pederson!

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What is worse than Jerry Sanduski? Nothing

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Knock knock, Who's there? Banana Banana who? Banana Smith, I'm here for the Smith Family Reunion.

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Yo momma's so fat that when she died of congestive heart failure, your family had to pay extra for a larger coffin to bury her in.

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Q. What is the difference between an ass kisser and a brown noser? A. Depth Perception.

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If Timmy has 2 apples and Sarah has 7 apples, what is the square root of the distance of Mars and Jupiter divided by the speed of light if X equals the value of negative infinity given the equation X(2) - E=MC/7?

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What is a dog's favorite color? None,dogs have colorblindness.

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why was the hobo sad his box was confiscated

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops