Rachel: Wanna hear a conundrum? Robby: Sure! Racheal: Vampire Value card.

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Knock, Knock ...

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A apple is red a banana is to never mind that joke sucks

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what did the boy in the blue hat do? wear his blue hat

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i find your gravy quite lumpy.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick.

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If Johnny has 5 apples and Susie has 7 apples, will they give them to the homeless?

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Why did the clock say 10:30? It was a digital clock!

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Why didn't john go to school? He has terminal cancer and he must stay at hospital

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How does a yeti say hi? Raaawwwrrrr

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emma: mat has a quick reaction time

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Little Stephanie was up all night on Christmas eve excited for her new bike that Santa was going to bring her. After tossing and turning for what seemed like decades, the sunset finally arose and Stephanie ran down the steps to unwrap her new bike with the family. Immediately after she went down the staircase, she found her parents marinated in their own blood, with knife wounds all around their body.

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Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

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A car walks into a bar.

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Why'd Sally fall of the swing? Sally's a fish.

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Why was the little boy crying? Because his older brother was forcing him to pee on an electrical socket.

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Why did the black man go to church? Because his father died.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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Here is a nursery rhyme: Jane is a scruff, she has a head full of nits. She also had pain in her great big... Now don't get excited. Don't be mislead. Because all that Jane had was a pain in her head!

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What did the vegitarian order for brunch. VEGITARIANS DONT BELIEVE IN ICE CREAM>

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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What is the greatest lie ever? "I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

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When's the worst time to use skin moisturizer? When you're a burn victim.

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Why was the boy sad? His parents died in a horrible accient earlier that day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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