A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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How do you keep an idiot busy? Give him something to do.

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How many 3 legged black Irish catholic obstetricians, walking into a bar, does it take to make a chicken cross the road? Fish!

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Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

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What is big, eats cats, smells good, but looks like shit? A big, cat eating, good smelling piece of shit

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When I meet the woman of my dreams, she wont know what hit her... Nor will the police.

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Why did the tornado cross the road? Cuz it's a tornado. Don't question it. Run.

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An Indian, American and French man walk into the bar simultaneously. Unfortunately, they get stuck in the door.

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Roses are red, ill give you a wink, two in the pink, and one in the stink.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know you have to ask the chicken if you speak chicken

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What is the biggest lie in the world? I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

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Q: 1 out of every 44 presidents can dunk, who is it? A: How the hell am i suppost to know

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Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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Your mother is so morbidly obese that if she sat on me, she would crush my skull and kill me.

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A car walks into a bar.

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What happened to Kurt Cobain? He committed suicide. He shot himself in the head with a shotgun and then he died.

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What did the African get for dinner? Ebola Rice

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Getting shot.

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Why did little Suzy fall of the Swing? Someone threw a fridge at her.

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What do you call a Mexican? Whatever his name is you racist.

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knock knock who's there? your mom your mom who? I'm sorry to tell your mom is dead :.(

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What did the waffle say when the black guy started eating him? Nothing, because waffles are inanimate objects and therefore cannot talk.

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How do you save the world in 2012? You aren't. 2012 isn't going to happen!

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there are three women witch one is married? the one with the ring on its finger

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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