The ability to live the life of a dead person.

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Two girls are backpacking in the Sierra Nevada. They walk 8 km from their base camp at a bearing of 42 degrees. After lunch, they document the wildlife they have seen because they are tracking the populations of species native to the area. Then they continue on their hike, but this time at a bearing of 127 degrees. After 5 km, they reach their destination for the day and set up a temporary camp.

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emma: mat has a quick reaction time

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pickles are green infection is yellow all the girls i know call me a good fellow

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Is it a bird, is it a plane?! No it's.... It's a bird.

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your mom is so ugly, when she throws a boomerang it doesn't come back

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Q:Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Conrad Barry

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-knock knock! -doors open

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Women's Rights

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What did the black man do in the Italian Pub? He gave a 20% tip and couldn't have been more courteous.

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Why did the man cross the street? He just wanted to .. i don't see why not, i mean he could have gotten ran over by a train on a road but who knows he could have been run over by a turtle!

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A man walked into a room and said to his friend, "I am about to show you something amazing." He claps twice and the lights turn on. He is using a device called The Clapper made by Joseph Enterprises, Inc. using advanced technology that was patented in 1985.

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Why did the stop sign run a red light? Because it couldn't see its face...

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple

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Why did Helen Keller cross the road? Hoefuwpugosihfioapfsoihosw[

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Roses are red Violets are blue Its 2 in the morning Go the f+%& to sleep.

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Your mom's so dumb she has cancer...... oh wait that's racist

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How did the mecanic die? He drowned

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What can fly, but can not swim? Malaysia Airlines Flight 370

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What do you get when you cross isopropil alcohol,ammonia; dish detergent fluid, water, vinegar, and lemon oil? Window Cleaner.

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whats worse than finding half a worm in your apple? being wrongly accussed of a crime you didnt commit because of your race, and being put on death row

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What's up? Not the Twin Towers.

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Why cant Joe drive his tractor? Because he doesn't have any arms or legs. Why doesn't Joe have any arms or legs? BECAUSE JOE IS A POTATO.

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how do goldfishes drown? you pull them backward water fills there lung and there die

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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