Why did the girl scream in terror? Because her parents are being murdered.

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Roses are Red Violets are Purple But nothing rhymes with purple.

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Why wasnt the black man entitled to a social welfare cheque? Because he made quite good money at a nearby hospital, where he worked as a doctor

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? Yes.

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A jewish man trips and breaks his nose

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What do you call a Mexican without a lawnmower. A Mexican that is fresh out of college and does not yet own a lawnmower.

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Q. If you have 4 pencils and I have 7 apples, how many pancakes can we fit on the roof? A. Purple because aliens don't wear hats.

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what's funnier than AIDS on a holocaust boy? everything. AIDS and the Holocaust are two terrible things.

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hi

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Just kidding, he didn't cross the road, he had no legs.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate you, Go die in a hole.

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Q: What do you call a cow wearing a hat? A: A cow wearing a hat.

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How did the man get arested? For doing something leagle.

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Nick Cannon

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A doctor walks into a bar, he stumbles backwards as he is taking his coat of, and the barman chuckles.

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Why can't Johnny ride a bike? Because Johnny is a potato.

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Why did the black guy stop drinking his kool-aid? He learned of its high sugar content and began to drink a glass of water as a healthier option.

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What'd the black woman say when she met her husband's white mistress? Have you seen Jamal's socks?

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What did the lady with Alzheimer's do yesterday She can't remember

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look this kid up on facebook and spam him!! its funny, Josh Noonan, also his cell number is 603 560 3399....

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Knock Knock Who's there? It is actually not a good idea to say "who's there" to the random person outside. The man could be a robber or a murderer, and will realize a person is inside. He could bomb the door down and do anything to kill you. You should look through the window first, or through the little peep hole. If the person outside is an acquaintance, then you can respond. However it is best to not reply and leave the stranger alone. Safety is key to living a happy joyful life.

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Patient- Doctor! I feel like a piece of ****! Doctor- What is ****? Patient- It's four dots on the computer screen representing a curse word. Doctor- What computer screen?

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what do you call the head-less man sitting on your porch? By what ever his name is!!

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What do you call an African American sitting on a park bench? Elephant-man (I forgot to mention, he has a giant elephant trunk)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops