What is the difference between a duck? one of its legs is both the same.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

a blind man walks into a wall

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Girl goes to see a sex therapist. Girl says, "Doc, though this has never been a problem, for the past 3 months I have been unable to reach climax. Can you help me?" Doc says, "Yes.". And after an intense 18 months of therapy the doctor helped the girl to discover that her inability to reach climax was related to issues of childhood sexual abuse. And after another 36 months of therapy the girl finally found the courage to confront and forgive her unrepentant abuser, as she realized that by not forgiving him, it was like drinking poison while hoping that he would die. And though the doctor did help her,as he had said, the girl never regained her ability to reach climax again.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

What does it mean if your born on opposite day? you have sids

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

What happened when a star exploded? It killed billions of other sentient beings.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

What do you call someone trying to be funny? An anti-comedian.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

why do prostitutes do what they do? Because they have abusive fathers who always used them as sex slaves as children

thumb_up thumb_down -37

What do you call a man with a diploma? A high school graduate.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

What do you get if you cross a egg and toast? Egg n soldiers.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Why couldn't the fan turn on? Because it was broken.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

the bible

thumb_up thumb_down -37

What do you get when you breed a dog and a cat together? A call from the RSPCA.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Why did Sara fall off the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

So my girlfriend comes back from Jamaica this weekend. There are as many hairs per square inch on your body as a chimpanzee.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Knock, Knock No one was home.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Why are cats mammals? Because they are descended from primordial mammals in the distant past which are the common ancestors of all mammals.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Roses are red viloets are blue mw3 sucks and bf3 is good

thumb_up thumb_down -39

J?????????????????o??????????????????????k?????????????????????????e?????????????????????????????????????s??????????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????o??????????????????????n??????????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????y???????????????????????????????????o????????????????????????????????u????????????????????????????????.?????????????????????????????.????????????????????.????????????????????????

thumb_up thumb_down -39

What happens when you give a math problem to a blonde? She works through it to arrive at the answer.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

"How high are you?" "I don't know, sir." "Well, look at the god damn altimeter."

thumb_up thumb_down -39

What did the foreigners do to pass time? They blew up the twin towers.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

If you are riding on a boat and all the wheels fall off, how many pancakes would it take to make a dog house? It does not matter because fish don't like tomatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

What does a cow do at McDonald's? He is eaten by obese people.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops