So 185 cowboys walk into a bar and the bartender says "I can't serve 185 cowboys!" The cowboys ask why not and the bartender says "Because that would exceed the legal maximum occupancy of this building."

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Why did humpty dumpty have a great fall? He was committing suicide.

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Yo mamma is so dumb, she bought a Wii and was satisfied with her purchase

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Anthony sucks

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your mom is so fat jesus couldnt even lift her spirits

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Q:What's red and crawls up your leg? A: A homesick abortion

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Justin Bieber

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A boy spilt his milk on the floor, and then cleaned it up before his mum got home.

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What's slow and spotted? A cheetah, I lied about the slow part

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What's woman spelled backwards? Sandwich-maker.

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What did the man with AIDS say to the other man? I have AIDS and will most likely succumb to the disease.

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A man walked into a bar. He was meeting his friends but was 30 minutes early so he went down the road to buy some food. He had recently began dieting after watching a series of lifestyle programs which informed him of the potential risks involved with high cholesterol and blood pressure levels. He purchased a garden salad and a freshly squeezed orange juice, and made it back to the bar in time to meet his friends.

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Why did the farmer's wife leave the farm? Because she was a lesbian.

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Knock-knock. Who's there? Me.

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Friends are like trees, they fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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how many Arabs and Jews can you fit on a bus? The bus in question is a 56 seater,so 56. If you cram some people in the aisles you could probably fit 65 if you didn't care about anyone's comfortability sheesh you might even for in 100 or more.

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What's Black/White and red all over? Obama when he gets a little flustered.

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There is a Mexican, American, and an Italian on a boat.They start to sink. All of them brought things from their country. The Mexican threw burritos over and said, "We have too much of these." The American threw american cheese over and said, "We have too much of these in our country." The Italian throws over pizza and says the same thing. They are still sinking. Then, the American picks up the Mexican, throws him over and says, "We have too much of these in our country."

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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how do you get a clown off a swing??? hit him in the back with an ax!

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How many hipsters does it take to change a light bulb? ...You mean, you don't know?

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A priest a rabbi and a minister are all standing at the gates of heaven. Us mortal beings can only conjecture what might've have taken place.

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What do a helicopter and a banana have in common? They are both edible. Except for the helicopter.

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WHERE WAS THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENTENTS AT THE BOTTEM!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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