Eliz, Neo-Nero, its me Clint, had to fake my death for some years in order to get back to the order. Neo, I know Nero picked you as his successor, but honestly, I was his first choice, and I know you well enough to understand that things are getting out of hand over there. I will be there in 2 minutes Liz and you and I can meet up Neo, seriously what are you doing over there? Unless there is a problem do not bother answering, allow me to take charge of operations at least until tou calm down Neo, and unless you got problems with my absent authority I suggest you stop torturing people at once, and seriously if you cannot control your own people, you better let me back in charge. It is time to turn some things around guys, believe it or not but I found where the Spetz came from and I got em all, as for the Nazi scum they where just hired thugs and as far as my Intel goes most of those where taken down by Nero. Clint Lawman. Moral: "WTF? THESE ARE NOT EVEN MORALS! NO THESE ARE THE CODES WE USED TO AUTHENTICATE THE SOURCE AND SENDER OMG! ORLY? SRLSLY? LOL OMG!"

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How many Spanish people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Uno

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What did the doctor tell his patient? Unfortunately you have cancer.

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What is about the size of a sausage, flesh-colored and looks like a penis, if you illuminate it with a flashlight on monday nights? - a penis.

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What is the difference between a car accident and being on your period? A period is less bloody.

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How did the blond know that you like her? You said,"Baby, I like you"

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Why are black people so good at basketball because they can jump shoot and steel

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thats what she she. no really thats what she said

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Why did the guy get glasses? So he could get his dick into the vagina.

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A whore walks in to a bar. She soon finds her John and they leave to his hotel room.

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Roses are red Violets are too I am color blind How about you

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Yo momma so fat she weighs 400 pounds.

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Yo momma is so ugly that she uses it as motivation to work hard and thus for achieve more than a lot of whores do

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What did the man think of when he saw a squadron of military bombers flying over his home? The football game is about to start

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

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Why did the Germans conquer Poland so quickly? Heavy military manufacturing and Blitzkrieg battlefield tactics.

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What did the old lady call the black pilot who's name was Marcus? Marcus

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why did the man take the bus to work he didnt have a liscence

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roses are red violets are indigo

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Two peanuts were crossing a road. One was salted.

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why did suzie fall off the swing? because she had no arms.. knock, knock who's there? not suzie

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Two friends were running late for their school gathering. As they arrived the train station, one friend said 'Quick, we need to catch the train!' The other replied, 'Can't we just get in it?'

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What did one cat say to another? Cats cant talk

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Why did Betty fall out of the tree? Because she was dead! ????

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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