Stones cannot fly. Humans cannot fly either. Therefore.. I wish I didn't get AIDS...

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your mom was so fat that she died.

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So three philosophers walk into a bar. Is it necessarily the case that they walk into a bar?

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why did the man hit the flight attendant? Im just kidding he didnt.

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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What did the man with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Why did little Suzie spill her drink? Since birth she has lacked a jaw

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two muffins were in an oven, one muffin said to the other, " ohmygod! its so hot in here!" the other muffin said,"AHHHHHH!!!! its a talking muffin!!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didnt. Why do we have to live in a world where people have to be so concered about why a stupid chicken decides to cross a road. Shouldnt we all be more focused on ways to get a better economy, or maybe end world hunger?

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Why did the math student refuse to do his geometry homework? Straight lines do not exist, so there is no real world application to any geometric shape.

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whats worse than nailing 8 babies to 8 trees? nailing 1 baby to 8 trees.

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A jewish man trips and breaks his nose

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Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. They all fall on a small boy below, putting him into a 20-year coma.

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how many couples does it take to screw in a light bulb. 1 the wife to go buy the light bulb and the husbend to put it in.

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Women's rights

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What does the fox say? A scream-y howl. A shrill, hoarse scream of anguish, it sounds more than anything like a human baby undergoing some kind of physical torture.

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Why couldn't the hobo buy any clothes? They did not have his size available.

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Pants and God shorts: God: Jews ur my people nao! Jews: Yay we are Gods chosen people! Riches and gRape awaits us! World domination next! God: Well, not quite what I meant but, err... Close enough? Jews: YAY! Moral: So much for "the chosen ones" :(

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Knock knock Who's there? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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What comes after 69... Mouthwash

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Why was the black man forced off of the roller coaster He had heart disease

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What is the difference between a goat? It can neither ride a bike.

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whats worse than a worm in your apple? the Holocaust

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Yo mama's so ugly, She cured cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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