watch me nae nae

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's the difference between a guitar and a fish? Fish are living organisms and guitars are instruments used for people's entertainment

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Im black

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Four brothers joined the army and were deployed to Iraq. Two of them committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the little boy say to his malignant tumour? "Hello" The tumour did not respond.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

I like to thumb up my own jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What happened to the mentaly challenged person is walking down the street? He pooped on the sidewalk and got escorted to his house

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas? A Coffin.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How did Pablo get into America from Mexico? He drove here!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

a man goes for blood check up ..........his whole hand was frozen >>>>the doctor cuts his finger'''''' he comes outside crying n sits in a chair n cries.............]]]]]] the person near him asks him why is he cryin...he says i came 4 my blood test the doctor cut my finger.the person next to him cried aloud......the person asked y r u cryin>>>>>>>>>>i came her 4 my urine test ..........????????lol

thumb_up thumb_down -11

a guy walks into the bedroom with a duck in his arms, his wife is in bed half nakid. he then coments out loud this is the pig im f**king. his wife says huny your holding a duck. then he with a serious look on his face says im sory i wasent talking to you

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Getting AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q: A plane crashes on the boarder of Mexico and America, where do you bury the survivors. A: You don't because there were none, everyone fucking died!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How many black people does it take to complete the simplest task such as washing their own hair? A shitload! thats why slavery was so populer back in the day. (and gays were big then to because they had to shower together to remember to wash their hair.)

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Jesus was born and rased a jew

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why doesnt snow like Asians? Snow is a form of precipitation within the Earth's atmosphere in the form of crystalline water ice, consisting of a multitude of snowflakes that fall from clouds. Since snow is composed of small ice particles, it is a granular material. It has an open and therefore soft structure, unless packed by external pressure. Snowflakes come in a variety of sizes and shapes. Types which fall in the form of a ball due to melting and refreezing, rather than a flake, are known as graupel, ice pellets or snow grains. Therefore since snow is unhuman they are then thus incapable of emotions because they lack any vitals organs.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

my candy brings all the kids to the yard and i'm like- get in the van.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

whats deead and gone lewis`s dog. well now it is

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the cake say to the icing? Come here

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a horse standing alone in an empty field? Tesco's own Beef Lasagne.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How did the old man feel when he couldn't have sex? Viagravated

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Your mom's so fat, I tried to rape her but couldn't find her p**** and gave up. Instead I decided to take her out to dinner. We enjoyed a lovely meal and I spent the rest of the night trimming her fat with a vegetable peeler while she screamed and bled all over the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Imagine a scenario Add a Rhubarb Crumble into your scenario Add your mother and father sitting together watching the news in your scenario. Your scenario should take place in an old people's home Add an Olympic athlete doing the splits into your scenario If there were any crane-flies in your scenario, be sure to subtract them at once. Divide your scenario by two. Your scenario should now be a mental image of flying horses and a hippopotamus eating a large salmon mousse. There will be a pig tied to a pair of sunglasses.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

They say once you go black, you never go black. But clearly they weren't referring to Nigel, who had an average-sized penis at best.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops