What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry made it out of the chambers...

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what's worse than the Holocaust. Finding two worms in your apple.

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guy walks into a bar, ouch

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What did the doctor say to the actor? Your an actor.

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What do you call someone who is unwilfully forced into a life of emotional abuse and domestic violence? My daughter.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are unintelligent creatures of instinct, and can tell no significant differences between the pavement and the road. It was unfortunate that a bus was speeding past at the moment this event happened.

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I was watching two muffins baking in an oven. One said to the other, "Wow, it's hot in here." The other one said "Wow! A talking muffin!" I went to my psychiatrist the next day, to increase the dosage on my medication.

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Do gingers have souls ? No, Gingers are a myth made up in the 13th centuary to scare little kids.

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Kid 1 Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken. Kid 2 Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys. Kid 1 You know what? I think you're right Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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why was the kid sitting in a wooden chair? Because at the early age of four he was diagnosed with cancer and genital warts!

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What is the difference?

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What did the man with no head say to the women?

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How many blonds does it take to screw in a light bulb? ... It shouldn't take anymore than one person to do this job, regardless of there hair color.

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Whats worse than 10 dead babies in the street? 11 babies in the street.

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obama

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An Irish guy, a black guy, and an Asian guy walk into a bar. They all caught the plague and died.

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A guy walked into a store and bought a candy bar. Why? Because he wanted some chocolate.

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What did the black man say after he swallowed the bicycle? He didn't say anything. Swallowing a bicycle is physically impossible.

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The next sentence is true. The last sentence was a lie.

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What do you call 47 black people dead at the bottom of the ocean? A terrible hate crime

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A Muslim walks into a public library. 32 people killed in the explosion.

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A man walks in to a bar with a frog stapled to his head. The bar tender says What the heck is that. The frog says I don't know this thing has been coming out of my but for two days

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What happens when you throw a red rock into a purple river? It gets wet...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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