Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog

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What do you call a cat at the bottom of the ocean? A cat.

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What did the Jew get for Christmas? Nothing

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So a man walks into a bar, right?

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Fun fact: Steel wool comes from the fleeces of iron sheep.

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If Chuck Norris were to roundhouse you. Then something previously happened before the altercation, that caused tension.

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Knock knock? Who's there? Set up. Set up who? Punch line!

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A man walks into a doctor's office and says "Doc, I blacked out last night and have a sore ass." The doctor took some x-rays and informed him he had colon cancer.

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What's the difference between a bicycle? An orange because it has no sleeves.

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What's the difference between a woman and the Universe ? One is full of mysteries mankind may never understand, the other is, well, the Universe.

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A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: If I knew I wouldn't be asking you.

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-Knock knock -Use the doorbell -Oh... ding dong -Who is it? -Me -Oh -Yeah -Cool -Come in -Okay -Take off your shoes -Alright -How are you? -Good -That's good -Yeah -Okay -K -Oh -Bye -See ya

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Chuck Norris counted to infinity; by calculating the sum of a divergent series.

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What happens when an old lady bumps into a black man in the middle of the night? He politely offers her help getting home and she accepts.

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This is no joke. Well, I did warn you.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse then precedes to beat the bartender voraciously for making fun of his religion.

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Q: What's worse than finding out yor girlfriend is a guy? A: He had sex with your dad.

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Justin Bieber tries to get into a club but is not allowed because he is to young.

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Yo mama's so fat, she weighs 283 pounds.

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How do you pacify Hitler? Give him jews.

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hey! Wanna hear a bird joke? No. Well this is Hawkward....

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch! He tripped over the little step at the entrance. But don't worry, he's not hurt, it just startled him for a second there. They should put a caution sign out front, somebody might get a serious injury. You can never be too safe, after all.

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There are 3 guys named:Poop, Shut up and Manners. They all were speeding down the street, they took a sharp turn and Poop fell out of the back. A cop pulled them over while Manners got out to go get Poop. The cop says, "whats your name." "Shut up." "No seriously whats your name." "Shut up" he says a little bit harsher. "Wheres your manners?" the cop says. "Back there picking up Poop."

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What do you call white trash Garbage

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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