Roses are red Bacon is also red Poems are hard Bacon

who ate all the food in zimbabwe? Nick bigg.. he later died of cancer and aids

What's the difference between a Jew and a Canoe Well one is a human, beating heart, and the other is a small boat you row in

What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

A dog, a cat, and a a fish were having a conversation while their owners were away. Ashton Kutcher is a murderer.

A hobo said to another hobo "Im homeless"

An early Jewish man walks into a bar where a number of stormtroopers have gathered for drinks and is taken into custody and then transported by railcar to a camp where he and other persecuted minorities are deliberately imprisoned in a relatively small space with inadequate facilities where they await their eventual mass execution.

Girl: I wrote a poem. Boy: Let's hear it! Girl: I like you, thats a start. You don't, so we are growing apart. In my heart there's a little tear, its funny to see how much you care. I hate the way you played my heart. You never finish what you start. Boy: Cool. Whose is for? Girl: You... Boy: Wow ummm, I have to go to......................yeah bye.

what do you call a tall skiny kid with a very big ego autistic

Cliterus

How can you tell if your roomate is gay? If he gets an erection when you have anal sex with him.

Q: What do the Terms of Service say? A: I dont know, I didnt read them.

An Irishman, a Jew, an Asian, and a Priest all walk into a bar This is an example of a well-balanced community

A man walks into a bar, Esept it wasn't a bar and he was running.

What's tall, has a really long neck, and eats leaves? My tall vegan neighbor's giraffe

Whats greasy and long? Your moms chesthair

Q: What did the kid say after he told a stupid joke? A: Well they banned me from Anti-Joke!!

Why did the boy engage in oral sex with the other boy. He was a hormonal homosexual.

two scientists walk into a bar. one says, "i want h2o." the other says, "i want h2o too." the bartender gives them both water and nobody dies because he is not irresponsible enough to give someone concentrated hydrogen peroxide as a drink.

A polar bear and a seal are sitting on an ice floe. The polar bear looks at the seal and says, "RAWRRRRRRRRRGGG" and then kills and eats him. A horse walks into a bar Barman says "Why the long face?" The horse replies "My mum died this morning".

What do you call a black man who likes watermelon and fried chicken? Someone who likes good food.

What rhymes with float,boat,moat,coat and goat but can not be on a boat, can not float, can not be in a moat, can not be on a coat and can not ride a goat? A zoat because it's not a real word and therefore is incapable of doing any of those things.

Knock-Knock Whos there? You're about to get shell shocked...

What did the boy with asthma say to his friend I can't breath

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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