Two dogs are sitting by a fire hydrant. One turns to the other and says absolutely nothing because dogs can't speak.

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Why did the baby bird have no friends? Because he chose not to socialize with the baby birds.

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world society

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How do you kill a black man? feed him mayonase

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I like to use vasoline during sex. I put it on the doorknob so she can't escape.

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Why couldn't the blonde turn on the TV? The TV was broken.

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What did the empty bar stool say to the one next to him? "You look like you have a lot on your shoulders!"

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Dyslexic drunk died choking on his own vimto last night

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile? " Hey Robin, get in the Batmobile."

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How long does it take a black woman to have a baby? Nine months, give or take a few days depending on whether she goes into labour early or not.

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The global news

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How do you get a tissue to dance. You don't.

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Why was the kid running around? He was on fire

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a stupid chicken wandering around.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

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Knock knock. Whose there? Jehovahs witnesses.

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what's the difference between a chicken and a grape? They're both purple........ except for the chicken

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what is the difference between peanut butter and a dead baby? dead babies dont stick to the roof of your mouth when you are eating them.

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Q:Why did Jimmy eat an apple? A:He was hungry.

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How do you get 2x1=4? Do the wrong math.

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if it walks like a duck and looks like a duck your probably looking at a goose

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What do you call a Mexican without any arms or legs? A bean.

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I am very humble.

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my throat Really started to hurt, like reallly badly, and i remember On sponge bob, he laughed so much his laugh box broke. well, my throat really hurts. please help! can i get my laugh box back? will i never be able to laugh again and have to get it replaced like squidward did?!!? please answer, i have a friend who would probably give me part of her laugh box, but she Laughs like a hyena

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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