What do you call a deer with no eyes? extremely unfortunate...

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Puns are terrible. I love them.

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what's the difference between a chicken and a grape? They're both purple........ except for the chicken

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Why was the kid running around? He was on fire

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I am very humble.

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How long does it take a black woman to have a baby? Nine months, give or take a few days depending on whether she goes into labour early or not.

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What do you call a Mexican without any arms or legs? A bean.

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Knock knock. Whose there? Jehovahs witnesses.

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Why did little Susie fall off the cliff? I pushed her.

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How do you get a tissue to dance. You don't.

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Q:Why did Jimmy eat an apple? A:He was hungry.

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How do you get 2x1=4? Do the wrong math.

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what is the difference between peanut butter and a dead baby? dead babies dont stick to the roof of your mouth when you are eating them.

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if it walks like a duck and looks like a duck your probably looking at a goose

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The global news

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When time is the best time to make a wish during the day? 9:11

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a man walks into a bar after a long day at work, and asks for a drink. he finishes, pays the bill and leaves a handsome tip for the bartender and heads home.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Why did Timmy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because I kicked her in face! Why didn't she get back up? Because she didn't have any friends!

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What is worse than getting a bad grade on a test. Having your family dog bled out in front of you, bitch.

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Out of Jill, Jason, Jesse, Jane and Harold, which one is the odd one out? Jason, because he only has one arm.

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What comes after 23? 24.

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What did the little boy get for christimas? Nothing because he's a selfish asshole.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It followed a trail of bird feed that was strewn across the street.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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