Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homosexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual pandas just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homosexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

An Italian, a Mexican, and an American all stand in one room. The Italian throws pasta out the window and says "We have too much of this in our country." The Mexican throws a taco out the window and says "We have too much of this in our country." The American throws a burger out the window and says "We have too much of this in our country."

I man walks into a bar. He orders a drink, takes around 13.5 minutes to drink it, then walks out. It takes him 10.7 minutes to walk home, 2.8 minutes less than he spent in the bar. When he is home, he decides to have a bath. 7.8 minutes into bathing, a radio plugged into an outlet near his tub falls into the water with him and he is killed. 29 miles away a woman sneezes twice.

One day there was 3 bears, a papa bear, a mama bear, and a baby bear. They were out swimming when suddenly a girl comes over to their house and tries to sit down. She sits on the big chair and says "too big", then she sits on the little chair and says "too small" and then sits on the medium chair and says "just right". Suddenly, the bears come back. Papa bear: "somebody has been sitting on my chair!" Baby bear "somebody has been sitting on my chair too!" Mama bear "somebody has been sitting on my chair, and she still here!" The girl says "Hi my name is Goldilocks." After about few minutes introducing each other, they ate dinner and they all had a great time.

Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

'A blonde', 'a brunette', and 'a redhead' are ways of referring to women who have hair of a certain color.

what's the difference between a blue fridge falling off a cliff and a yellow one? the yellow one isn't falling of a cliff.

nolan is gay

What's red and screams? A peeled baby in a bag of salt.

irish man drinking john smiths

Face Hunter is scum

How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit it with an axe!

Wht did noah7262 cross the road? to abandon his friends and play Modern Warfare 3 on xbox live. asshole.

A drunkard stumbles into the bar. Now he's got thousand's of dollars in medical bills.

Why did Rudolph poop while flying over Chicago? Actually, he had to go since trip started, and that's just where it happened to land.

what's a self-driving car 10 years from now? probably just "a car".

Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

why did the black man go to court he was a lawyer it's is job

What happened to the toddler on the swing? She was left unatended and was raped.

what did the dog say to the cat? nothing cause animals dont talk.

Why can't Kim and Arnold get childern ? because they are 2 stones.

Flowers are colors Love me

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They had several drinks, conversed animatedly, and heartily enjoyed themselves.

Q. What goes 100 mph and is green? A. A frog in a blender

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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