How do you make a sausage roll? Wrap some sausage meat in a pastry dough made of plain flour, water, salt and fat, and bake it in an oven.

why do black people like kool-aid? it's a tasty refreshment

It was Valentines Day today, I thought I should get her something... I brought flowers to her grave.

How do you get rich? Sell knives at warped tour.

Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

a man walks into a bar he has a drinking problem and we are all consered

What's big and long? My dick.

What's the difference between Mitt Romney and a statue of Mitt Romney? The statue doesn't change its position.

What did the KKK member say to the african american man. Nothing, he just killed him.

Why can't Mich Jackson draw a perfect circle? Because he's dead.

Q.what did god say when he made the first black person? A.oh shit i burnt it.

Guess what I saw today?..........Nothing I'm Blind.

if my evil next door neighbor is building a rocket to steal the moon with the help of 3 little girls, a grumpy old man and about 5000 small yellow poeple; what do i do? get sued for coping a copyrighted movie plot

A woman with big boobs walks into a bar and gets raped

what is the differance between a toyata and a van full of dead babies I dont own a toyata

Why didn't Debbie go to the theme park with the rest of her family? Because she died the week before.

your mother is so fat that she got brain damaged from cardiac arrest and now needs medical care for the rest of her life.

Q:Why did Hitler lose World War II? A:His "gas" bill.

What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

I hated the Reading festival, i'm dyslexic. I hated it because my family died in a housefire while I was there.

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

AHLTFKCITAWKSHTC

Whats the difference between Obama and Hitler? One is the President of the United States The other is a fascist dictator that killed millions.

Wanna hear a joke??... No...... oh ok :(

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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