roses are red violets are blue i have shit in my mouth so screw you

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Why did the weird alien jump everywhere? You probably don't want to know. If you learned why it jumped everywhere,you probably would make fun of it. I don't know if you know this, but aliens are sensitive. If you made fun of him, you probably would create World War 3:Humans VS Aliens.

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Why was the muslim surprised? A tyrannosaurus rex bit off his legs.

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What's the deal with brown?

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Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are pink Daisys are white

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what do you call a a miget crossed with a vampire? A miget, vampires are a figment of you're screwed up imagination.

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Whats brown and sticky? - A brown stick.

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what happened when Bob told a joke? Joe laughed.

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scenario: retarded monkey upside down in a mirror question: why is jims dad fat answer: the mexican chicken is an aperadus

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What was black, then white, now dead all over? Michael Jackson.

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What did the man say to the man with no head? You have no head

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Two pretzels were walking down the street when one got assaulted...

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cancer

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Why did Hitler kill so many Jews? Because he didn't like them.

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Q:What's worst than reading a bad joke? A: Reading a joke on anti-joke and the person who posted the joke obviously doesn't get how a anti-joke works. For example... read this again ^^

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Listen, I cannot as much as I would like, to take the full responsibility for every decision my former followers might decide to make of their own, we are no religion nor do we follow any kind of doctrines, we encourage freedom but also respect for our fellow human beings, all of them regardless of race or affiliation. But you let me know whoever has as much as looked at you the wrong way, and I will make sure they no longer find themselves welcome within my order, nor anywhere else if their actions merit the firm hands of justice.

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John walked up to his dad one morning and shouted, "Dad, it's my birthday!" Dad said, "Cool, how old are you?" John says, "I'm seven!" Dad tells him to go downstairs and tell his grandpa. Johnny runs down and says, "Grandpa, it's my birthday, guess how old I am!" Grandpa sticks his? hand in John's pants and sticks his thumb into his anus. As he pulls his hand out, he pinches his penis. Grandpa says, "You're seven." John says, "How did you know?" Grandpa says, "I heard you tell your dad upstairs."

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What's the difference between a duck? A toothbrush, because a car only has four doors!

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 8 had a lot of PCP went crazy and shoved a gun down 6's throat

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" Turns out a man suffering from schizophrenia believes he is a bartender for animals as his health slowly declines as his family comes to visit him every day.

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A woman crashes her car into a pole Thier family is suing for a hit and run

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A man went to the doctor and told him he was having the strangest dream. "First I was a tee pee Then I was a wigwam A tee pee, a wigwam. Do you have any idea what could be wrong?" The doctor looked at the man and said "You have aids."

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John, Where are you John: Here! Where's here? John: nevermind

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Very, very hungry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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