Adam Thomas is homosexual

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what do Russians play? Tetris, what else?

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Their was once a man named Bob Clemens who really wanted to have sex with an underage girl. So one day he went on an online chat site to find one. He ran into this young girl and told her all the things he wanted to do to her and she told him that she had never done anything and really wanted to try it. Bob went over to her house one day and she told him to sit down and grab some cookies while she came back. She came back and Bob gave her the roughest pounding that any human being could recieve.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the slutty blonde get her boyfriend for Valentine's Day? Nothing because she had died of AIDS months ago.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what if i told you that leonardo decaprio didnt need an oscar but an oscar needed a leonardo decaprio!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!(_)_)=============D

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you call someone with no arms, one leg,and an eye patch? names

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you call a mexican who steals toasters? A mexican toaster thief.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Josh Moran sticks polish sausage up his ear and moves it back and forth while squeezing his balls until they rupture.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

An Indian lady is pushing her child down a footpath in a stroller whilst leading her dog. A refridgerator lands on the mother. Why did the Chinese man behind her cry? Because loss of life is a frantic event and having witnessed such an event he was deeply shocked. He was also sad that no dogs were killed. This is because a dog killed his wife in a freak accident and he has held a grudge against the species ever since.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's black, white, and red all over? Half of a dalmatian.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Q: how do you stop a blonde woman from drowning? A: unplug the stopper in the bathtub Q: how do you stop a baby from drowning? A: take your foot off its head

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Two tomatoes are crossing the road. Suddenly one of them gets hit by a car. He goes "AGH!"

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Q: whats the difference between a shoe and a ginger? A: shoes have soles.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the Jews say before they got of the bus? Let's make like a Jewish kid's forskin and get the hell out of here.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q: What do you call an alligator in a vest? A: An investigator

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How do chinese people call the firemen? By phone.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why was little Sammy crying? because she had a frog stapled to her forehead

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what is green and smells bad? an orange dolphin that poops out rainbows.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How do you make a mime make noise? Throw a brick at his face

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q: What's worse than biting into and apple and finding a worm? A: being severely malnourished, thus physically inept to do most simple tasks

thumb_up thumb_down +14

If you woke up in the morning feeling like P Diddy, get tested. Immediately.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Where's the soap?

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the man say to the other man? Hi

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What is blue and has clouds in it? The sky.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops