What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

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I always wanted to know what the future will hold in the decades to come... Until I realized the idiotness of my own thought for it is nigh impossible for us humans to see the future... Except... That the ancient Mayan civilization prophesized the end of the universe, which I did take into consideration as I slowly nibbled my way through the waffle cone till I had realized that I had reached the paper surrounding the cone and immediately spat it out for it leaves a fowl taste In my mouth, then continued eating my ice cream as I pondered the future and the anti-climatic ending of this anti-joke.

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Why did the kid with no legs fall down the stairs? Because his dad pushed him...

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What's big, green, has 4 legs, and if it falls out of a tree will kill you? A pool table

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I just lied when I clicked the 'I have read and agree to the Terms of Service' to post this when in fact, I didn't read it at all.

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There were 50 koreans; half of them liked gangnam style but the other half didn't. Why didn't the other half like gangnam style? They were north koreans.

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an alien is walking down the street he can't breathe our air and quickly suffocates and dies

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women are like puzzles because prior to 1920 neither had the right to vote, puzzles still don't.

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Why was baby Johnny crying because a monkey came and ripped of his dick

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends how hard you throw them.

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How do u get suzzy off a swing? You tell her to get off

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Yo mama so fat, her Patronus is a cake.

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Q: What do you call someone who cant swim? A: A person that cant swim.

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I went to the opticians to get my eyes checked. The optician said "you need glasses".

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family.

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what do you order when it's a sunday in nyc during a solar eclipse on a leap year past 12:00 pm? what ever you like

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Where did the duck hide its pail? UNDER THE STAIRS!!

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How do Yankees fans cheer for their favorite sports team? Let's go Yankees!

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So A duck wants to be a musician. Day1: He cuts of his beak attempting to sing. Day2: Dead

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One girl said to her friends, "LOL guys wait for me." She ran to a pile of corpses. The girl was about to lose her sanity as she was in denial when her friends had died. She held hands of two of the corpses and smiled and pretended everything was ok.

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Why does Jordan Abu aita have a small pepe? Because he is black

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What did Anne Frank say to the Nazis who found her? Please be gentle.

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What do you call a woman on a bike? A dike

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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