Do you like fishsticks No

PSN IS UP

A squirrel and an owl are sitting in a tree. The squirrel turns to the owl and says nothing, because it is a squirrel and squirrels can't talk. The owl turns to the squirrel and eats it, because it is a bird of prey.

Why didn't the blond cry at her child's funeral? She died, too. It was a terrible accident.

Why was sally mopping the floor? Because she was a slave

fava beans

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because Acl tear stepped on a spit.

Why did John break down in tears? Because he was molested as a child.

Q: Why couldn't the ginger play soul music ? A: He couldn't hit the right notes

How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dyslexia is a cognitive learning disability characterized by the sufferer's inability to fluently spell, speak and read. Being a intellectual disability, the chances that dyslexia could impair the practical functionality of a sufferer are very slim and hence it it is highly probable that it would only take one dyslexic to change a light bulb in the simplest of conditions. However, to definitively answer this question, I would have to know a range of variables such as the height above the ground at which the light socket is mounted, the physical height of the dyslexic, the voltage and amp characteristics of the light-bulb itself, the physical well-being of the dyslexic etc. These variables are unknown, are not mentioned in the initial question (as is common for this type of question) and hence, I cannot answer this question to any degree of accuracy.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven hundred and eighty nine.

Knock knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave was beginning to get very scared of his best friend at this time, so he ran away panicking.

What do you call an Asian man without any clothes on? -naked

Why didn't the girl's ring fit? She had no fingers.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Dementia.

Why was little Timmy afraid of his dentist? Because he was 10 foot scorpion.

Why did the Asian crash her car? Someone shit on her windsheild.

What do you call Jake Morter? Jake Morter

Whats slippery and wet? A wet slipper.

What did Mary say to Vishnikharmut? You're name is weird. What did Vishnikharmut say to Mary? Your grammar is incorrect.

What's sadder than a dead baby? Any dead adult, considering how much more they've contributed to society.

What's worse than an earthquake? Two earthquakes. What's worse than two earthquakes? Three earthquakes. What's worse than three earthquakes? The world exploding.

What do you call a gay Chinese math teacher? A gay Chinese math teacher.

Beating cancer. Guess Steve Jobs they didn't make an app for that.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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