- Anti Joke

Whats big, red and will cause severe injuries possibly fatalities if it falls out a tree? A phone box

Kys

whats the best thing ever to happen to chuk norris ? he was born !!!!

Q: Why was the math book sad? A: Because he recently found out that his parents died in a tragic car accident.

whats the best thing about polio...death

Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

I america you read books. But in Soviet Russa, Books read YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!

what happened to the guy that got shot in the head? Nothing, it was a water gun.

Me and the wife spent her Birthday in bed, if you know what I mean. We're both severely disabled.

A guy forgot his 20th wedding anniversary. His wife was really mad, and said that she better have something in the driveway that goes from 0 to 350 in 10 seconds, and he quickly pulled out an AK-47 and murdered her violently.

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

Knock Knock: There is no one in here! GTFO! Okay, yes sir or mam Moral: I told you there is no one here, gtfo already!

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

I like my women like I like my coffee... In a cup.

Batman vs Superman the movie spoilers: Batman and Superman argue over how to handle some alien invaders, Batman wants to kill em, Superman believes he can save em. In the end they work together and save everybody. Moral: I hope they change the script, ever noticed how every hero vs hero themed movie/cartoon, ends up with them allying at the end? If ya do not believe me, just wait for the movie to come out.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What is big, red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater

Your mother is so fat, she developed diabetes and was rushed to hospital. She might not make it.

why did the plane crash because it was 9-11

A man jumped off a bridge. He went bungee jumping with his family and had a great time.

What did the horse say to the man? The man woke up from his dream so he didn't know either

What was a hard time for people? the great depression

What did the apple tree say to the farmer? "Stop picking on me"

What's another name for asexual reproduction? Parthenogenesis.

What do you call someone who explores wild cave systems? A spelunker.