Dude, you were so drunk last night that you got in a terrible car accident, and now you are paralyzed from the waste down for life.

im gey

A man walks into his house to see his TV is moving. He notices a black man who starts running when he enters. He then calls the police and gives a description of the man. The robber gets placed under arrest.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Why did the turkey cross the road? His friend, the chicken, had just been hit by a passing car.

Actually, Red Bull helps temporarily restore wakefulness when experiencing fatique or drowsiness.

Why couldn't Suzie ride the swings? She got hit by a refrigerator.

What did the blind, deaf and dumb lady name her kid? Sebastion.

Paul walker: Breaks, stop Breaks: no

Jerry Sandusky prefers twenty eight year olds. 20 eight year olds.

What's worse than having to watch your dad rape your mom? Having to watch your mom rape your dad.

Why did the boy jump off a bridge? Because he saw it on tv

Why did Santa go to a rap concert? Because Santa was a rapper

Q:why did i cross the road A: time to get a watch

What did the black man see when he looked in the mirror? His reflection.

Why was the man struck by lightning? Josh Mathai was there.

Yo mama so stupid that when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 twice instead

when placing the bolt in the side of the metal rememb............ shit wrong book ........................................................................

Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash with a hammer. The other is a watermelon.

Why can a black man beat a white man in basketball? They are generally better at basketball Why cant a black man beat a KKK member in basketball? He valued his life and didnt want to die

What is the answer to the question of life? Over 9000

"Why the long face?" The bartender asked. "I was born with a severe cleft palette and a jaw deformity. The surgery lets me eat and drink but my parents couldn't afford the cosmetic part of the surgery, the scarring got worse as I grew older. Can I have a beer please?" I replied.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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