What's rape when you shout surprise? The crime, committed by a man, of forcing another person to have sexual intercourse with him, especially by the threat or use of violence.

Why doesn't the man like iced tea? Because he likes it hot.

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot, you racist.

What do you call a mexican man working at a Taco Bell? A young man freshly out of high-school, who could not get into college because his family is sadly struck with poverty. He also has a baby on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection when having relations with his girlfriend while he was intoxicated. I wish him the best of luck!

What do you call mexicans running down the hallway? JAIL BREAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

Doctor, Doctor, I feel like there's two of me! There's not. Your long lost twin died of terminal cancer.

why did the baby start crying? because he was very hungry and hadn't been feed all day

there once was a man from Nantucket. He was a fisherman.

What did Al gore say after he sold his TV Station to Arab Oil Money? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. CHA-CHING!

Q: Why did Little Suzie fall off of the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Little Suzie!

What do you say to a jew with blood on his leg? Are you okay?

What's worse, a dead baby or an abortion? A dead baby on a bayonet

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I got to go now Gonna take a poo.

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

What's the best thing for a hangover? Heavy drinking the night before.

In Soviet Russia, you have no rights!

What is the anwer to life? (>^v^ )> KIRBY DANCE

What do you call Ed Milliband after he's been decapitated? Dead Milliband.

My computer crashed today I was watching porn.

Why are Pine trees green? Because light reflects at different wavelengths, and the chlorophyll, found in chloroplasts, being abundant in the needles of pine trees, Reflect the correct wavelength for green.

Your wife died during the delivery.

An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar... However, it's really busy, so they leave and go to a different bar.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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