I went to the doctor & he gave only 6 months to live. I told him I couldn't pay my bill, he said "that doesn't change the fact you're going to die soon."

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Why is a man like a packet of cards? Both are organic.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have ADD Hey look, a squirrel!!

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Your momma is so fat, shes skinny.

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Bill: Heydidyouknowlosersaywhat Donny: What? Bill: Loser

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Your son has been in a car accident and has died.

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Asians.

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Q: why does the cat go out of the house by the window A: It doesn't the window is closed

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What has two legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog.

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How many squirrels does it take to change a light bulb? As they can't find any, they are just squirrels, they can not asist little timmy choking on the lightbulb rolling around on the floor.

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The Charlotte Bobcats winning more than 10 games

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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Q: what do you call a man eating some chicken ? A: a hungry man (hahahahahahaha.......i should get a life)

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What did Electra give her Dad for his birthday? Head. That's why her name is Electra.

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What is the difference between a seal and an armadillo? They are both aquatic animals, except for the armadillo.

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A man walks into a bar,gets a drink, and then leaves.

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What did the baseball coach say to his son? Nothing. He was dead.

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Why did the boy cry when he got circumcised? Because he couldn't fap.

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What do you call a Mexican that doesn't have a lawn mower? An honest working induvidual that just so happens to live in the city and does not own a lawn mower

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Of course, the capacity to create a better society, is well within the natural limits of humankind, we do not need Gods in order to be strong, honorable kind, respectful, and so on, we do not need empty promises. We only need, to use our potential as humans, believe in it, and do our best only, if we desire the best results, take care of those that suffer, and believe that they will be there for us when we need them. We can all do it, humanity, yet choosing a lifestyle where we become peasants or soldiers, all promised happiness AFTER we have lived our lives, is what the people have decided. This is the extent of the average man and woman, even if it is far beyond the power of humanity.

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Why did the Japanese man fall down the stairs? He was blind and deaf and not aware of his surroundings to prevent himself from doing so.

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What's long and really hard? The fourth grade.

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How do you make a person cross the road? Ask them nicely.

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Roses are reb, Violets are dlue, Forgive my spelling, I'm byslexic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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