two men are standing on a roof. Man #1: do you want me to push you off a roof? Man #2: No.

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What do you get when you rub 2 redheads together? Fire.

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A man walks in to a bar with a frog stapled to his head. The bar tender says What the heck is that. The frog says I don't know this thing has been coming out of my but for two days

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I helped build the town school. But when people see me, no one says "Hey, there's the guy that built the town school." I helped put out the flames, when the city was on fire. But when people see me they don't say "Hey, there's the hero that saved the city." But I have sex with one goat.... And people judge me justifiably asd having sex with goats is really disgusting and sticks in peoples minds.

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"Really, how is your wife?" "You know she's dead right?" "Cool mine too!" They high five in mid air and lived happily ever after

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feminine literature

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U mad?

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your mamma so fat... she went to hell.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the barman says "why the long face?" The horse replies, "I am Sarah Jessica Parker."

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What do you say to a girl with two black eyes? Nothing you've already told her twice.

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a man walk into a bakery, he sais... may i have a loaf of bread....

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Whats the difference between a fish and whale? Ones bigger than the other.

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Roses are red Violets are blue The sun is bright.

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why was the boy sad? because his mom just punched his hamburger

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What's the best part of twenty one year old's? Their bodies have matured enough that the U.S. government deems it safe for them to consume alcoholic beverages with proper I.D.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? I don't know, I've never tried to.

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Why was the fat girl a virgin? Good morals

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Bro my d*ck is like 20 inches. That's not healthy, an erection that big will deprive your brain of too much blood and kill you

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What's the difference between black and white people? One is black.

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What did the astronaut say at AA? Alcohol is ruining my life.

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Why did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Because you touch yourself at night

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What's the difference between a car and 10 dead babies? I don't have 10 dead babies in my garage.

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What do you call a guy with no arms, no legs, and floats? Nothing, its rude to make fun of disabilities.

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Knock Knock Who's there? UPS you have a package from Amazon. \ Oh, Thanks, where do I sign? Right here. Ok, thanks, have a nice day. Thanks you too.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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