I live in a very rural area, so it's not easy to just go to the store and pick something up. I try to find out how to do things with the stuff I have on hand, so I Googled spot remover, but there are only pictures of stain cleaners. Please help. Spot has rabies.

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''I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''

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Who was sorry when the fat kid fell over last year? The whole of Japan.

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-On a scale of one to ten, what's your favourite colour of the alphabet? -The answer is yes, because aliens don't wear hats.

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I have an erection My mom!

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what do you call a mexican whos lost his car? nothing, nick ate him

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one man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. when he was drinking the beer he choked and died

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A girl accidentally clicks on an advertisement while on anti-jokes.com, the girl silently curses and quickly presses the back button.

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Why couldn't the black guy support his family? He was only 3 years old.

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I like my women how I like my coffee; without a penis.

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What's worse than a necrophobiac in a morgue? A necrophiliac. What's worse than a necrophiliac in a morgue? Seeing your family hacked to death by an evil axe murderer.

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what's gray, red, and goes over a 100 mph? a toad in a blender

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Roses are red, Violets aren't. This doesn't make sense. Potatoes and brown.

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Johnny: One day dad i will be tall like you! (Later that day johnny was found dead in a garbage bag)

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Knock, knock Who's there? I'm there.

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What did the the girl say to the deaf boy after he asked her out? He doesn't know

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Q: What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Chrismas? A: Cancer

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Q:what's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat A:The wheel chair

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer Roses are red

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Microwave

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what's black and has a huge sac? A negro

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Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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Why did the wheel fall of the car?? Cause you can't fit 10 pancakes inside of a doghouse.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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