Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face! -Lets go Mets

What has hands but cannot feel? A sociopath; due to his or her mental health condition they are incapable of feeling true emotion.

why did the chicken cross the road? because it was tired of the people on the side she was on who told lame anti jokes, so she tried to stay away from them.

your girlfriend is so dumb she is clinically retareded

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

Why did the clown chase the boy? The boy was sad and needed cheering up

Q:What's the greatest part about having sex with twenty five year old girls? A: There's 20 of them

why did the mom beat up her son with downs because he was matt daly

What did Justin Bieber say when he lost his tampon? Where's my tampon?

what is the difference between jelly and jam? jelly is smoother where jam has chunks of fruit in it...... and i cant jelly my penis down your throat

A black man walks in to a 7 Eleven with a gun in his left pocket. He innocently walks over to the place where they keep all the hostess treats, and decides to purchase a pack of crumb donuts. The gun was purely for self defense, it was a bad neighborhood.

Roses are Red, Violets are blue, most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

What's the best way to suprise your friend? Shove a banana up his ass.

why did the kids pull the fire alarm? because there was a fire.

Knock knock. I know who is there... What? No, I lied...

If boobs are round. And so are balls. Then i just cant figure out why the sky is blue?

What did the Orange say to the Apple? Hi

Why was the man sad? Cause his dog fell off a cliff

Girl goes to see a sex therapist. Girl says, "Doc, though this has never been a problem, for the past 3 months I have been unable to reach climax. Can you help me?" Doc says, "Yes.". And after an intense 18 months of therapy the doctor helped the girl to discover that her inability to reach climax was related to issues of childhood sexual abuse. And after another 36 months of therapy the girl finally found the courage to confront and forgive her unrepentant abuser, as she realized that by not forgiving him, it was like drinking poison while hoping that he would die. And though the doctor did help her,as he had said, the girl never regained her ability to reach climax again.

your mommas so stupid she has trouble doing things an average person would manage easily

What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff!

what is brown and wet? Muddy water

my gave me a game i said thank you

The speakers on my computer were broken, so I was going to replace them with John Boehner. Because he is the SPEAKER of the house.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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