An Asian, a white man and a black man were running in a race. The Asian won and the black man came second due to his lack of training and motivation over the past couple of months.

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I man sees a shooting star and makes a wish. Nothing happens as shooting stars are incapable of granting wishes.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long mane?"

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Why did the giant frog attack the party goers with a ballistic missile? oh where tos tart...it's, just such a long story, I don't really know where to begin, in fact it's probably better if you just take my word for it, no need to go into details. we just don't have time for that now.

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Hey Jake can I use your lawnmower? Why Michael, so you can run over my cat like you did last night

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What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, his mouth was full of it's intestines.

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emma: mat has a quick reaction time

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pickles are green infection is yellow all the girls i know call me a good fellow

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The ability to live the life of a dead person.

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How did the mecanic die? He drowned

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Roses are red Violets are blue Its 2 in the morning Go the f+%& to sleep.

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Why did the stop sign run a red light? Because it couldn't see its face...

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Why did the man cross the street? He just wanted to .. i don't see why not, i mean he could have gotten ran over by a train on a road but who knows he could have been run over by a turtle!

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WHO LET THE GHOST OUT! BOO BOO BOO BOO BOO! Mortals: That was a bit funny...

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How can you tell if a man is choking? Stick a fridge down his throat

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Q:Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Conrad Barry

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-knock knock! -doors open

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Women's Rights

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A man walks into a bar. He says "ouch".

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Why was six afraid of seven? because seven has cold, dead eyes.

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What do you call a man who kills others for his own amusement? A psychologist

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What starts with an N and ends with R, that you wouldn't want to call a black person? Neighbor

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Q: What's the difference between a bird and a fly? A: A bird can fly, but a fly can't bird.

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What is the best game in the world? There is no answer because that would be an opinion and opinions cannont be proved or measured.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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