What did the woman say when she ate crabs. This smells like my vagina (This women died slowly from crabs)

whats long, hairy, and has one eye? my cat fluffy, he has cancer.

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

Why was the house painted pink? I dont know, why don't you ask the owner?

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

What's worse than finding half a suicide tablet in your apple? Finding half a worm.

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

roses are black, violets are black, im dead.

Knock Knock ! Who's there? Jim. Oh come in.

What's yellow, black, and makes you laugh? A bus full of black people going off a cliff.

It's a penguin that breathes by its asshole. One day, he sits down, and he dies.

Why was little Jimmy so sad? Because he was H.I.V. positive

Why did the little girl cry? She lives in Haiti.

How do you get a person to stop talking to you? Ask nicely to please be quiet and let me talk.

Roses are brown Violets are brown Everything's brown Who shit on my flowers

TOYS TOYS TOYS IN THE ATTIC

how many babies dose it take to paint a fence it depends on how hard you throw them

If black guys really have big packages, why are there standards so low, they prefer fat girls? I don't know, but prejudice and racism is wrong dickhead.

Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

your mama is so fat, she sat on the ipod touch and made the ipad.

A chicken walks into a barn.

How do you catch a predator? You throw a beartrap at a child.

Two Naked men jump off a cliff. Three months later, an entire pack of Cub Scouts were enrolled in group therapy. It's ongoing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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