Whats the similarity between a rabbit and a grape? There both purple, except for the rabbit.

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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a woman gives birth at the hospital in china and then the doctor comes in and says doctor- i have good news and bad news for your baby mother-what is it doctor- bad or good mother-bad doctor-the bad news is that the baby is a girl and the good news is that your baby has cancer

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Roses are reb, Violets are dlue, Forgive my spelling, I'm byslexic.

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How do you make a person cross the road? Ask them nicely.

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What did Santa say to the prostitute? "Merry Christmas!"

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What's long and really hard? The fourth grade.

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Of course, the capacity to create a better society, is well within the natural limits of humankind, we do not need Gods in order to be strong, honorable kind, respectful, and so on, we do not need empty promises. We only need, to use our potential as humans, believe in it, and do our best only, if we desire the best results, take care of those that suffer, and believe that they will be there for us when we need them. We can all do it, humanity, yet choosing a lifestyle where we become peasants or soldiers, all promised happiness AFTER we have lived our lives, is what the people have decided. This is the extent of the average man and woman, even if it is far beyond the power of humanity.

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What is the difference between a seal and an armadillo? They are both aquatic animals, except for the armadillo.

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What do you call a Mexican that doesn't have a lawn mower? An honest working induvidual that just so happens to live in the city and does not own a lawn mower

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Why did the boy cry when he got circumcised? Because he couldn't fap.

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How did I do in the running events? Not that good, I'm a paraplegic.

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What did the baseball coach say to his son? Nothing. He was dead.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Your dad is so hairy, that he shaves to look more cleanly.

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"Knock knock." "Come in."

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What do you call a spaceman on Mars? Confused, because with the current technology it is impossible to send a human into space and onto Mars.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender does not ask about its facial characteristics, because he is wondering why there is a horse standing in his bar.

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Knock Knock Whose there? The pizza you ordered That's weird, the Pizza I ordered shouldn't be able to talk

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Why did Dr. Phil fall of the swing? He couldn't figure out the couples problem.

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We start counting at 1, therefore 0 is countless. I've slept with countless women.

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Why was the man so cold? He was in a fridge

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Two goldfish are swimming in the ocean. One says to another, "I don't think we will be able to survive in this salty environment".

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The Chinese government. The way they treat their citizens just isn't funny.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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