What's the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

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Damn Nero... So you are saying there is no hope left, the underground society is dead and buried.

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Why did the drunk man puke? Because he was drunk.

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in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

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What do Jesus, The Easter Bunny, and Santa Claus all have in common? Their middle names are all Larry.

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What did the red apple say when it saw a black man an irish man, and an asian walk into a bar? nothing apples cant talk.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Oh, And one of them has a penis.

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Once upon time the government was corrupt Jk, it always has been

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What's worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies. What's worse than a pile of dead babies? One baby is alive in the middle. What's worse than that? He is eating his way out...

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What is big, red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater

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Why did the turkey cross the road? His friend, the chicken, had just been hit by a passing car.

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Obamacare

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The new Minons film reminds me of most foreign films.. You can't undertand a fucking word they say and they're all yellow

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Why did the boy fail his midterm? he didnt study.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll pop? After one hour, twelve minutes, and fifty-three seconds, Dave calculated that it approximately took 247 licks.

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How do you tickle a tree? you dont you are a schizo stop kicking leaves

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin inside a blender.

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why did joe drown ? he had no arms

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"Knock knock" "The doors open" "Oh, okay"

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What do you call a kid with an eye-patch and a speech impediment? Names.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have cancer, Herp Derp

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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What's a black guys favourite thing to eat? Food.

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Why was the man sad? He was molested as a child.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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