I scream, you scream, we all scream because we're getting murdered.

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I woke up today

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There's a mexican and african american in a car. Who's driving? A cop.

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Why do Jews have such big noses? They don't; To suggest phenotypic variation along religious lines is preposterous.

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why did the man get ran over by a turtle? he crossed the STREET

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Who you gonna call? Gobstoppers

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To avoid being killed in the slaughter house.

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Billy wanted a toy for Christmas. Sadly, Billy died before Christmas.

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What's long, hard and full of seamen? A submarine.

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What do you call 4 Mexicans getting into a car late at night? 3rd Shift carpooling

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What did the mormon say when he complemented the gay person? Nothing, because mormons hate gays.

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whats the hardest part about eating a vegitable getting your mouth around the wheelchair.

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What do you call a pool filled with black people? A pool

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Q. How do you stop a clown from smiling? A. You hit it in the face with an axe.

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You know what's stupid and gay? Idiots and homosexuals, respectively.

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There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

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What's the opposite of white? Black. You're racist. You fapped.

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Why did the orange put on the sun block? Because it was afraid of turning into a TAN-gerine!

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kaite is dumb that is true

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Why was little Jimmy so sad? Because he was H.I.V. positive

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How do you get a person to stop talking to you? Ask nicely to please be quiet and let me talk.

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Why did the little girl cry? She lives in Haiti.

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your mama is so fat, she sat on the ipod touch and made the ipad.

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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