hey i just met you and this is crazy... but loose my number and keep the baby LOL

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the Jewish man say to the banana? Nothing, because he has common sense

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Adam Sandler is still funny ! *cough*

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Knock Knock. Who's There. Teenage Pregnancy

thumb_up thumb_down +14

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

world peace

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Many men trespass on my property to taste my milk based beverages. They insist that it's quality is superior to yours. I could teach you how to make such milk based beverages, but I would have to levy a fee.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's the difference between a ghost and a dolphin? A ghost isn't a dolphin.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they're ugly and they smell.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

life is a barrel of tomatoes...unless you paint them blue.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A man walks into a bar,gets a drink, and then leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Whats worse biting into an apple and finding a worm? -bidoof

thumb_up thumb_down +14

give me a thumbs up

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q: How many burgers did little Johnny eat? A: Involuntary erections.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Wanna hear a funny story? Sure. Ok,

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why was the black man drowning? His boat sank.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

So an African American man and another man of Hispanic, more specifically Mexico, are riding in the backseat of a car, who's driving? Probably their private chauffeurs, but most definitely not someone related to the Police Department.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are potentially dangerous weapons that may inflict bodily harm.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How are Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga similar? They are both men except Justin Beiber

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Paragnormal Activity: The confused sequels. My wife literally had an heart attack 5/5! -Awesome reviews. I am going to need therapy for the rest of my life! 5 out of 5 stars! -Star reviews THIS MOVIE KILLED MY DOG! 4.5/5 -Petlovers I literally died! 10/10 -Rotten Potatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Okay, so your school has a fire drill, and a ginger asks why the alarm went off. You reply, “Some new kid saw your hair and pulled the fire alarm

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why couldn't Matilda walk to school? Because a dog ripped her legs off.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do gay kittens eat? Cat food. Friskies and Fancy Feast are both popular brands.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops