What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

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why are black people so good at basketball? because they understand the fundamentals, work hard at becoming better, and have fun playing the game/

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A kid has no friends.

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This is no joke. Well, I did warn you.

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whats better than a girl getting hit by a car? a girl getting hit by a car with my dick in her

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Why did the guy in the ferrari stop? -He hit the median at 100mph.

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Knock Knock Who's there A girl scout want to buy some cookies to raise money for my cardiac surgery?

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Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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Knock Knock Who's There? Jehovah's Witness

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Why did Jimmy fall of a building without a paracute? Because he lost a bet.

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What did the girl call the boy? ugly. they hated eachother.

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What did the Buddhist monk say to the hot dog vendor? Monks do not speak.

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Q. want to hear a really funny joke? A. Fred Figglie-horn

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Rosees are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia and I do too

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what's worse than the holocaust? black people whats worse than black people? mexicans Whats worse than mexicans? 2 mexicans Whats worse than 2 mexicans? Africa

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I drove my Chevy to the levy. It was dry.

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I once had a friend We had our arguments, and went our separate ways.

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Q: How many children did it take to screw in a light bulb? A: The light bulb was already screwed in and exploded after excessive tampering

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What did the plane say to the other plane? Boy, those towers fall!

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Why do people poke people on facebook? Because they have no friends and will die alone

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how come bob felt 'under pressure'? because somebody dropped a dumpster on him

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have 5 fingers. The middle one is for you.

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A jewish man runs into a wall with an erection. He broke his nose.

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A horse walks into a bar. The Barman asks "why the long face?" The horse says "My son was recently killed in a horrific horse racing accident"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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