Why do elephants paint there feet yellow? so they can hide in mustard bottles. Have you ever seen an elephant in a mustard bottle? exactly

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to kill two and a half men

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What did Sammy get for Christmas? Raped.

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What do you get when you cross a Zebra with a Sheep? Hounded by a religious group for playing God.

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A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? Anywhere from 2-8, depending on the size of the vehicle.

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What do you call a black person that plays golf? Jack, his name is Jack.

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Mom: Ask me if you're adopted Boy: Am I adopted? Mom: yes

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Why was the Jewish man celebrating cinco de mayo? Because he likes other cultures and Mexican food Except pork

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do you have a wife?

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your mom is so fat, that your father is no longer attracted to her and it is tearing your family apart.

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A man walks into a bar. He is then taken to the hospital for his concussion, seeing as the bar was made of metal

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I saw a number three walking past me in the street the other day and I thought to my self that's odd.

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Why did the prestigious college accept the Native American student? Trick question, Native Americans don't exist anymore.

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Why did the boy throw his clock out the window? After hours of waiting for the perfect victim, the boy spotted an elderly woman walking down the sidewalk. The clock barreled through the air, hitting the old woman on the head at extremely high speeds. She was immediately killed on contact.

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Knock knock. Come right on in.

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Seriously, all your new jokes are shit. They are either repeats of stuff previously on the site or they are just so unfunny you'd struggle to get a sympathy laugh from your mother. Please actually take the time to think of something worth submitting or do not submit at all. We know people with no arms can't knock on doors enough now, and many things are better than the holocaust. Do something new!

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Yo momma so fat that when she sat on the bible jesus poped out.

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josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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A black man,a Hispanic man, and a white man are in a race. The white man wins because he took steroids and used somebody else's urine for the drug test.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was in a van headed to the slaughterhouse.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the Shell Station.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? It is unlikely that this situation would occur, as tractors are very large objects and losing one would be very hard, furthermore, tractors are vital agricultural vehicles and most farmers would take care in not misplacing one.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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