what's silver and red and keeps crashing into the walls? a baby with forks in its eyes

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike!

thumb_up thumb_down +31

3 Chinese brothers (chu, bu, and fu) come to America and want to change there names. Chu becomes Chuck, Bu becomes Buck, and Fu becomes Tom because obscenities do not make acceptable names.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

what did jake say to the priest? hmmm, salty

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Knock knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave was beginning to get very scared of his best friend at this time, so he ran away panicking.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the Farmer had treated the Chicken and the rest of his family with great distaste, thus angering the Chicken to the point of rebellion against the Farmer with hopes of inspiring the other abused farm animals to act likewise.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

This is supposed to be an anti-joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What do you call mexicans running down the hallway? JAIL BREAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +29

I know where you live. No seriously im looking at you through your window. 80% of you just checked. 90% of you didnt realize i just ended that statement with a question mark. 100% of you just checked gotcha

thumb_up thumb_down +29

How many amoebas does it take to change a light bulb? Depending on your religious belief and the variation in evolutionary growth, a full study on the answer would require immense time and be very costly. I would also not feel comfortable providing an answer based on opinion or estimated guess. The answer is therefor be inconclusive.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What do you say when you see a flying donkey Wtf

thumb_up thumb_down +29

There is a blond and a burnette in a car. The blonde is driving. What a nice use of the carpool

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Once upon a time there was a tree. But it was just a tree, so it sat there. Then it didn't rain for a while, so the tree died. And nothing ever grew there again. The End

thumb_up thumb_down +29

what did the duck with roller skates say to the camel? how are the wife and kids?

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's the difference between a baby and an onion? One is a vegetable and the other is a human being.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Q: What do you get when a black man dates a white lady? A: A perfectly acceptable relationship.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the boy loose his hat Because he got hit by a plane

thumb_up thumb_down +27

You know what happened when I kissed a girl? I enjoyed it so immensely that I received an erection.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A man walked into the woods... Sorry, I forgot the rest of the joke...

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why didn't the girl's ring fit? She had no fingers.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

why was justin sad? his family was murdered

thumb_up thumb_down +27

whats worse then being a black kid with out a father? is not that bad it happens all the time

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Q: How fast does an F-16 fly? A: Pretty Fast

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops