Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but an orange gourd. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

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Why the West African Rhino is extinct? They were never Horny

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why did the man get ran over by a turtle? he crossed the STREET

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What's long, hard and full of seamen? A submarine.

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What's the opposite of white? Black. You're racist. You fapped.

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What do you call a pool filled with black people? A pool

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whats the hardest part about eating a vegitable getting your mouth around the wheelchair.

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What did the mormon say when he complemented the gay person? Nothing, because mormons hate gays.

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There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

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Q. How do you stop a clown from smiling? A. You hit it in the face with an axe.

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You know what's stupid and gay? Idiots and homosexuals, respectively.

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What do you call 4 Mexicans getting into a car late at night? 3rd Shift carpooling

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Why did the orange put on the sun block? Because it was afraid of turning into a TAN-gerine!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To avoid being killed in the slaughter house.

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kaite is dumb that is true

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Who you gonna call? Gobstoppers

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Billy wanted a toy for Christmas. Sadly, Billy died before Christmas.

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how do you upset a black guy kill his family :)

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Why did the black guy wear a hat? To keep the sun out of his eyes

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Whats long and black? The line at KFC.

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Boy: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're accent sure sounds like it.

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Why does Eric Clapton use a Mac? Because he prefers Macs.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends on its sex. Females weigh 150-250kg, and males weigh upwards of 350kg.

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Have you tried african food? No. Neither have they!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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