What's green and frolics in the forest? A flock of cucumbers.

What happens if you drop an yellow shirt into the Red Sea? It gets wet.

Girlfriend has 10 letters, but then again, so does freeeeedom

person 1: i have a good knock knock joke person 2: ok what is it? person 1: say knock knock! person 2: knock knock person 1: trollollollollollollo

What you do if you poo out a slug? Eat it.

Neutron walks into a bar and orders a drink. It never receives it because it can't talk and is far too small to see.

Q: How do you scream at a purple? A: Black people

why do cats hate dogs the Holocaust

what did the man say to his horse? sex. -teagan doherty

how many cucumbers dos it take to change a light bulb? none. cucumbers cant change light bulbs. dumbass.

Why did the little kid fall down? He was pushed

What did the man do when he found a lost dog in his yard? He shot it. This was a very old, lonely, and distressed man with many unresolved problems resulting from his childhood in poverty.

One day I went to the shop and bought some milk. THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE turtle man came with me. YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE YE live action

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

What did the man say to the woman giving him a blowjob? That feels good.

whats worse than a worm in your apple..? getting shot..

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road A: Will Smiths rapping attempt was suprisingly not harmful to his career as he later played in blockbusters such as Independence Day, Men in Black, The Pursuit of Happiness ect..

A blonde, brunette, and redhead find a cliff that is supposed to turn you into something which you exclaim upon leaping from the cliff. The brunette jumps off and exclaims: BIRD! She thus falls to her death on a ton of pointy rocks. The other two loot her corpse and walk away.

Why did the little girl fall off of her bike? Because she didn’t have any arms. like your mom

Why did the circus clown lose his balance? He had a seizure while on his unicycle, fell off, and bumped his head, leading to significant blunt trauma in the brain. Weeks later, after waking up from a coma, the doctors discover that he can no longer speak anything other than gibberish. His friends and family decide that he cannot go on living this way and decide to pull the plug.

*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and think it's original because I changed one word*

Girlfriend: Hey, you know whats the cutest thing ever? COMIC SANS Stabs girlfriend in the eyes.

what do you call a guy called Bill? Bill

Whats Worse then finding a worm in your apple. Finding a real joke on anti-joke.com

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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