Q: What did the lesbian say to her partner? A: We cannot get married in forty five states.

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And the girl said: "I'll be ready in 2 hours!"

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Why did man lay down? His dog ate his genitals.

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Who gets more action than my best friend Reese? My raped cousin....

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A black man, an Asian man, and a Mexican man jump off a bridge. They were all suffering from chronic depression and couldn't take the pressures of life anymore.

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"Why did Jim Jones put cyanide in the People's Temple Flavor Aid?" Because he understood that adding sugar would be bad for their teeth.

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Your moma is so fat, that Jabba the Hutt says: "Damn!!!"

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Why did the boy throw the clock out the window? He was tired of working for the man.

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What is more boring than watching paint dry? Aids

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why did you read this anti-joke? because you typed in antijoke on google or have the app on a phone

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Your Momma is so fat that she will most like lose a leg to diabetes which is totally preventable if she eats a well balanced diet. I hope she loses weight. Say hi to her from me please.

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Yo momma's so fat that when she died of congestive heart failure, your family had to pay extra for a larger coffin to bury her in.

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A knock knock B who's there A nobody

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What does a man say to his annoying friend? Please stop annoying me now.

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A guy walks into a bar. NOT!

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Why is chad so gay? Its his choice.

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Your mamas so fat that she went to the doctor and he said she has a very high case of diabetes so now she's trying to excerise more and watching what she eats.

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The word you are looking for is charm, not seduction, I am above such things, and while I have no reason whatsoever to believe either one of us can gain anything from going "eye for an eye", I am sure I can offer whatever financial and even specialized assistance you might require in order to get that eye of yours seeing clearer than before... Worry not, I shall outlaw the name Nero and all the derivations and similarities from my Order, unless someone named Nero actually happens to come by of course...

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How do you get Suzy to get off the swing? Ask her to move.

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What is purple and rhymes with apple? Nothing

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How many pancakes do you need to reach a 2.5m roof? Purple, because aliens don't fly

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A mormon walked into a bar and realised it was a bar the he leaves

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what did the african boy get for christmas - not food

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Can we still mine for gold in the American River? No, anyone seen mining for gold is considered a hobo and all the gold is cleared out by random people in the 17 century

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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