Q: why was the man punched in the face? A: I did like him.

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What did the boy dog say to the girl dog? Ruff

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whats the difference between Whitney Huston and rubber duck? The rubber duck dosent smoke crack. hmm to soon?

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Why was 7 afraid of 8? Because 8 knifed 10.

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What do stupid fat ugly women always say to me? “I think you have a problem with women.”

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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Person 1: Why does food from Subway taste so good? Person 2: I don't know, why? Person 1: Because their ingredients are fresh. Person 2: Um, OK? Person 1: Yeah, it's all under 18. Person 2: Shit...

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what is the difference beyween football and baseball the superbowl and world series

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What happens when 2 gay men rub their penises together Jello

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What do you call a Mexican with a rubber toe? Rober-to. What do you call a black guy with a big toe? Tobe Bryant

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Roses are red Violets are T I T S I like T I T S T I T S

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What does a kid with no arms and legs get for christman.... Cancer...

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side.

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Sometimes I sit in the bath and pretend im a bubble

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How do you kill a Jewish person? You shoot him multiple times in the face

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Knock, knock. Who's There? The Fire Department...

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What do you call a white guy with no friends? A white guy with no friends

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It's red or yellow but most likely grey, and when its hit your eye you are dead? A train :)

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Q: why did the dog fall down the stairs? A: Because I pushed him down.

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What do you call a man covered in bees? Nothing, you'll startle the bees!

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Q: How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? You don't. You just shut up and listen.

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What's the difference between zev hatis and a dwarf Nothing. They are both midgets and are going to die by the age of 25

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? Depending on the amount of saliva you produce each lick the answer to this question varies species to species.

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What bird can lift the most? i do not know, I suggest asking an Ornithologist

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops