Remember how I made you hypnotically cum by poking your own nose last time? When I told you that hypnotic story about the astrologer and the brain surgeon? So you wet yet? Think about how easy its going to be for me when I take out Mr.Big and slap down your coffee table with it, yeah... Feels cozy down there does it not?

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Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

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A frog, duck, monkey and beaver each enter a bar being carried by a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. If your wondering, the redhead carried two animals.

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name one pop artist who's better than Michael Jackson that's really hard. there's so many

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why was the boy sad. his father is an alcoholic that beats him daily.

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How many friends does it take to catch an owl? One because he was a bird catcher.

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Three men walk in to a bar, One ducked

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Why was the white man's baby black? The mother was black.

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I just found my mum has Alzheimer's, I hope it isn't contagious cause my mum has it too

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Knock knock ? Who's there ? Ipe Ipe who ? You sick !

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Whats brown and ryhmes with Snoop? Dr. Dre.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimers Roses are red Violets are blue Cabbage

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What did the boy with no mom get for Christmas? He was beaten by his drunken and abusive father.

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A man dies from a cat attack. he goes up to heaven. At the gates, St. Peter asks him, " how did you die sir?" The man doesn't reply so Peter says, "cat got your tongue?" "No," he says, "cat got my throat!"

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What did the mentally challenged kid get on his test? Drool

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What did the ethiopian give his wife for her birthday? HIV

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What's blue and looks just like water? Water.

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Knock Knock Whos there? You You Who? Who You Oh im Jim.

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thats the same sound ur mom made in bed last night

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Why was the girl stupid? Because she had a low IQ

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Why was the number 6 afraid of 7? It wasn't.

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A man walks into a bar. It was his push-up bar that he didn't install high enough. He bumps his head and it hurts.

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Elizabeth Warren

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"Knock knock" Come in!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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