Simon walks into a bar. He orders his favorite beer. The bartender says "Hey Simon, I see you're back with the usual, aye?" Simon says "Touch you tongue to your elbow." The bartender couldn't do it.

Q:how do confuse courtney A: give her a beer

Rachel: Wanna hear a conundrum? Robby: Sure! Racheal: Vampire Value card.

Hitler: honey what's for dinner? Hitlers wife: a jewwwsyy steak

H o m o comes out as homo

how to you confuse a blonde you ask her to recit the alphahbet back words

mom.what is red and green? dad. what? mom. your mama dad. you Mack me cry mom gooooooooooooooooood girl. mom have you seen gmom mom.no dad. your mom killed her girl. rely mom. yes girl.thanks she suck dick for money and now i have to get a new bed so thanks mom.ya dad. so you want to be dead mom and girl. or u want to be dead dad. help me plz nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo mom.yes girl yes

A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful business man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

Hey, wanna here a dirty joke? A pig fell in mud.

roses are red violets are black lewis norris has a fucking narra back

Two women are sitting on a park bench, minding their own business, saying nothing.

How do you eat a sandwich With yo mouth bi tch

One time at band camp.............that's it........

find the mistake in this sentence: Sadam Hussein: "hello" mistake: Sadam Hussein said hello!

WHY DID THE MAN FART HE WAS A FARTY PANTS AND WE CAN CHAT HERE ON THIS WEB GO TO ANTI JOKE SEE ME I WILL GIVE U JOKES

Huffing glue only becomes a problem when you get stuck on it

Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.

Q: What did Michael Jackson do while he was preparing for his newest world tour? A: He died.

What did the suspicious Hunchback say? I've got a hunch.

What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

Knock Knock! Who's there? The Police The Police who? We're sorry Ma'am your son has died in a car accident... --------- Knock Knock! Who's there? Not your son

A man spoke in a high-pitched voice. Another man said "Are you gay" He responded, "Why, yes"

What is white and square? A ping pong block

Tina: Mom, would you love me if I was straight Mom: Yes Tina: Would you love me if I was gay Mom: Yes Tina: Would you love me if I was Bi Mom: No Tina: Why not Mom: Because that's selfish!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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