Roses are red Violets are silly Grease up your flaps Cause here comes my willy!

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What did the fridge say when I opened it? Nothing.

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? It's Jeff. Hi there Jeff, come in, the doors open.

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Why is Henrik so AWESOME? Cos HE just IS!!!!

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How do you make time fly? Develop a flying suit to put on a sun dial.

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What did the one eyed boy say at the movie theater? 3D was a boy choice

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im not food

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So I want to write an Anti-Joke, so I go to the write your own tab and see in the security code box: Which one is a country- fried rice or fried chicken. C'mon, it's definitely fried rice.

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You know what's cool? Yep.

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Baby you're so hot I have an erection the size of an average penis.

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A seal walks into a club.

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What did the black man say when he noticed his crack was missing? I guess they fixed the sidewalk while I was at work.

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I walks over to da shop de oother day and there was this guy and he was like... I bought some petrol. LOoooooooooL

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Why did the little boy stick a fork in the electrical socket? Because he wanted to escape his abusive stepfather

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who has less of a soul then you? a ginger

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Long joke Your such a downey

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y was man afaid of fire?, cuz its hot

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Q: What did the police officer do when he saw another man getting assaulted. A: Went into a corner and started fapping to it.

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Why can't the Mexican float? He never learned the proper technique as he was not allowed to take swim class.

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Why did the black person eat fried chicken Because fried chicken tends to be an abundant food in the African American community and that was the quickest and cheapest weekend afternoon food source nearest to his house. It is also found in many other communities throughout the country and even the world. Oh yeah, he was hungry

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A woman walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Yes ma'am?". She orders a gin and tonic, but the bartender had gave her two without realising, and so she pays for one only. She starts to contemplate whether to tell the bartender about his error or to just leave it and have a free glass of gin and tonic. However as she is a christian, gluttony is a sin, and she already had enough to drink today. However, she feels the need to have a relaxing drink today, because as she was on her job as a receptionist, when a customer tripped on the last step of the stairs behind her and broke his neck, dying instantly, which deeply saddened her. This later led her to indulge on 3 glasses of red wine in the staff room. She finally concludes after a few moments pondering, to not tell the bartender about his error, and pampered herself with two relaxing glasses of gin and tonic. Her dead, mutilated body was later found in the rubble of a car after a head-on collision with a truck.

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What's the difference between an alligator and an argyle sweater? There are far too many conceivable differences between the two objects to be able to give an actual definite variance between them.

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bill goes to the room.. why? to fing a broom riddle boz full of burtiouse.

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Fred and DooDah go to their favorite lake to fish. After getting out on the water, DooDah hooks a huge fish, which pulls him overboard, and he drowns. Fred is brokenhearted and goes to tell DooDah's wife the news. She opens the door and hears Fred sing: "Guess who drowned in the lake today? DooDah! DooDah!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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