what is 1 plus 1 i don't know ask your teacher

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An Irishman, Englishman and Scotsman come across a magic slide. They each decide to take a turn. The Irishman goes first, sliding down and shouting "GOLD!", and finding himself in a pile of gold as he reaches the bottom. The Englishman slides down screaming "SILVER!", and lands in a heap of silver at the bottom. The Scotsman takes his turn, and shouts "WEEEE!" as he slides down. He gets up and realises what a needless waste of a wish his enjoyment cost him.

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what did the addidas sign say to the nike sign? I'm all in

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Q: what's red, green and goes over 100 miles per hour? A: a frog in a blender

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What did the baseball coach say to his son? Nothing. He was dead.

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a slice of tomato A really bad joke

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

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How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? -Fish

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What's clear and smells like alcohol? Probably alcohol, genius.

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silly rabbit trix are for kids and jews

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have alzheimer's, cheese on toast

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Why was the Black person afraid of the chainsaw? Be cause it goes run nigga nigga run nigga nigga run

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You know what topping goes bad with ice cream? Chloroform

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

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What did the potato say to the man It said nothing it is a potato

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Yo mamma is so skinny, she has developed anorexia, a serious eating disorder, which not only affects her, but also the ones that she loves and cares about.

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Why did the fridge fall off its bike? Because someone threw a little girl at it.

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was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

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pleas help someone is in my house i think hes trying to kill me i'm not even joking.

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A: Is this the Krusty Krab? B: No, this is Pizza Hut. Please stop prank calling us.

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i knew this one arab, who was so arab that there was nothing funny about him

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Grass is red, HOLY SHIT THE GARDEN'S ON FIRE

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Why didn't Hitler go to heaven? He killed millions of jews and was an atheist.

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Montague goes to the alcoholics meeting and says "Hello I'm Montague and I am an alcoholic" Evreyone points at him and chants "LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!" Montague is appaled, he expected to be welcomed with sympathy and respect. Then he realises his mistake. He has walked into meeting with a bottle of whisky and is wearing a Justin Beiber T Shirt

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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