What's worse than seeing Charlie sheen in a Turkish bath house? Watching the direct tv commercial for the 100th time today

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Why isn't Michael Jackson good at chess? Because he's dead.

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Sorry we dont serve time travlers here. A man walks into a bar.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, the little midget is coming for you. If you don't run and if you don't hide, you will probably be stepped on because of my incredible big size.

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What's better than wining the para Olympics? Wining the Olympics.

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Roses are blue Violets are red I shot your valentine Straight in the head

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Whats greasy and long? Your moms chesthair

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Q: What do you call a black person flying a plane? A: A pilot.

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What's more fun then spinning a dead baby around on a clothesline at 50 miles an hour? Stopping it with a shovel.

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THER ONCE WAS A jueny WITH A TEN FOOT WENNY AND HE WENT TO SHOW IT TO THE LADY NEXT DOOR SHE THOUGHT IT WAS A SNKE SO SHE HIT IT WITH A RAKE AND NOW ITS ONLY FIVE FOOT FOUR!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who let out the chicken?

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why did the little boy drop his ice cream cone? because he was hit by the planes that hit twin towers

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Why did the girl kill herself? Because she was brutally raped

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I live in Africa Give me water

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How do you survive the zombie apocolypse? You avoid dieing or being mutated in the living dead.

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A black man, a Asian, and a Jew fell into a pit and because of a lack of water they all died.

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Two men walk into a bar. The third man ducks.

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Q: What sound does a baby make when you put it in a blender? A: I don't know; I was too busy trying to find my camera.

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Life is like a box of chocolates, some are brown, and some are white.

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Carol never wore her safety goggles. Neither did Hellen Keller.

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What do the Wii, PS3, and Xbox 360 all have in common? None of them will get you laid.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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Q: Why are Dino-Nuggets so good? A: Because they are nuggets in the shape of dinosaurs.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops