Q: What do you call those assholes who always volunteer in lectures? A: Assholes. Fcuking assholes. They created the word asshole. Assholes

What"s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

Q: What do you call a black woman who can't tell you who her baby daddy is? A: "Mam". Rape is a serious and painful crime, and the strength to raise a child on her own without her consent is worthy of respect.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't the farmer shot him before he could have a chance at freedom.

Boy it's sure cold out today. Die

whos a sick fuck? jake morris

Q.A zebra somehow managed to get out of the zoo and started running all around the town. After some time he saw a zebra crossing(not an original zebra crossing the road but the black and white stripes)on the road.He stoppped suddenly.WHY? A. He was too tired to run any more!!!

Why weren't u sad when your sister died? You lived in a hut and were supplied with food for a week

When life throws lemons at you, just give up and commit suicide!

What's black and white and red all over and can't go through a revolving door? A nun with a spear stuck in her head.

Why has Bugs Bunny got big ears? Because he's a rabbit

Why did Jorge eat Larry's face? He was on bath salt.

what happened when glen haire jumped of a high building? he died.

cool story babe. now go make me a sammich.

What happens when you mix a camel and a penguin? A cenguin!

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? That depends on what his name is.

Knock Knock. Who's there? grape. Grape who? Purple grape.

Hmmm, how would Sherlock Holmes solve a crime?... Oh wait. He doesn't exist.

A Man walks into a bar and asks for a shot. The Bartender proceeds to unload a 30 round banana clip into his head, neck, and midsection.

My friend came in the barber's shop and asked me to cut his hair for him, i always have rude banter with him and i made a joke about his big bate nose. He acused me of calling him Jewish and threatened to sue me. This is how i found out that he was a white supremisist.

kill yourself....with a cigarette

What is worse than getting a bad grade on a test. Having your family dog bled out in front of you, bitch.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? It's hard to say, as this number depends on a large number of factors including the average area covered by one lick, the pH of saliva, the solubility of Tootsie Pops, the temperature of both the saliva and the Tootsie Pop, and the amount of saliva deposited on the Tootsie Pop after each lick. This is not to mention all the manufacturing irregularities that may occur during production, and varying tongue shapes and solvency properties of saliva.

What happens if you Put a Mental Patient in a cage He goes crazy, Develops schizophrenia and Eventually dies of Many Incurable Diseases

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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