What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? An Irishman with a metal bar (like a pole)

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Q: In 2900 A.D, why did the stars started blasting at each other and exploding? A: Because it was the time for "Star Wars".

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Dislike this.

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Q: Why can't sally play on the swing? A: Because she has no arms Q: Who was the first to climb mount everest? A: Not Sally

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What did the girl with no eyes say? I can not see.

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Lad: Whats that smell Girl: Nothing Lad: That is right nothing now get into the kitchen!

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When Glenn looks in the mirror all he sees is Nicole Sipes.

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A man walks into a bar, it's funny because he is an alcholholic

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If life hands you lemons you're probably hallucinating

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Take a chainsaw and cut the swing in half

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Mail Man: *Knocks on door* Guy & Girl: WHAT?! *laughing* Mail Man: Mail! Guy & Girl: Hold on she is almost done with the whip cream.

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A black man and a midget walk into a bar. They notice the beverages are unreasonably priced so they leave.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? Tell him he won the current game of hide n seek.

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black —Stevie Wonder

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A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism. "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "I already asked ''Banana who?'' Is that your real name? Who is this really?" "Knock Knock." "You are upsetting me. I am calling the police now. Please get off my property."

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Why did the boy cry Because he fell

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Why was the chair sad? It wasn't, for chairs do not posses the proper attributes to feel emotions such as depression.

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What's the difference between tiger woods and Santa clause? Tiger woods is a thug

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whats the difference between blue and green? there different colours.

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You're a big fat monkey.

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Why did the police officer shoot the man in the wheelchair? Says the police: "He was running"

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Why was George Washington buried in Virginia? Because he was dead.

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What do black people and bananas have in common? 50% of their DNA

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what did the dog say to the mailman? "hey thanks for the mail" the mailman replies "your welcome"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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