Why was the chair sad? It wasn't, for chairs do not posses the proper attributes to feel emotions such as depression.

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If you rewind Gozilla, it's about a giant lizard that helps rebuild a burnig city, and then goes back into the ocean again...

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A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism. "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "I already asked ''Banana who?'' Is that your real name? Who is this really?" "Knock Knock." "You are upsetting me. I am calling the police now. Please get off my property."

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whats the difference between blue and green? there different colours.

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What's the difference between humans and dogs? 4.

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A woman with big boobs walks into a bar and gets raped

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how do you get an old man to fall? tip over his wheelchair

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There is something in my butt what is It. My thong

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Your dads dead. lol

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There once was a boy. On his birthday, he got a small puppy. The puppy was white and had big eyes. Boy loved his puppy and the puppy loved the boy.

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Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the salamander, macaroni and cheese

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Have you ever seen a cowboy chasing boot?

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What do black people and bananas have in common? 50% of their DNA

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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what goes in hard, comes out soft, and you blow on it? bubble gum!

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a terrorist.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face" The horse responds "My daughter has cancer"

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one day a hippy and a nun wer on a bus, the hippy asks, Will you have sex with me? the none replies, heck no im a nun. the nun gets off the bus and the hippy follows. the bus driver stops him and says, i know how you can have sex with her, she goes to the cemitary at 9:00 every night, dress us as jesus and command her to have sex with you. okay thanks! the hippy says. that night the hippy dress's up as jesus finds the nun and says " i am jesus and i command you to have sex with me. The nun says okay but only A n a l because im a nun! and they get to it, when there done the hippy takes off his mask and says haha im the hippy, the nun takes off her mask and says haha im the bus driver!! like if you get it :)

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a homeless man walks into a bar, the bartender and patrons treat him nicely, and sympathize for his current situation.

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I walked up to the door and I asked the door how r u door, and he said, I'm a door!

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What happened to the alcoholic? He got liver cancer

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why did the man take the bus to work he didnt have a liscence

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A duck walks into a bar and the bartender--TOAST

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You might be a redneck if you have red on your neck

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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