"Knock knock..." "come in"

thumb_up thumb_down -18

That was slightly painful. I would appreciate it if you would stop such actions in the future

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the chicken cross the road? To distract everyone from the Mexican.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Q: What's black, long, and floppy? A: Black Licorice

thumb_up thumb_down -18

what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A man walked into a bar. That hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

what long green and bumpy? a pickle

thumb_up thumb_down -18

One day i woke up, and found my wife dead on the floor. lol.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

im jackson, i have a small willy, and like to finger my dog

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why was everyone screaming bloody murder? Their home team won

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Yo momma's so fat she ate Sally's arms. Knock Knock Who's There. The police we have a warrant for your mothers arrest on charges of cannibalism and kidnapping.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

9 tottenham fans walk into a french bar 2 minutes later French fans attack them saying this is for making our history lessons boring 1 shouts ohh the holocaust French fans ash him even more 5 say there call the jew squard next minute there getting attacked by a bunch of kids and lying that there were 30 neo Nazi men.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Knock knock Who's there? No one you care bout so why did u say who's there?

thumb_up thumb_down -18

knock knock? who's there? a guy..... so the man open's the door and the guy clutching a knife stabs repeatedly at his chest killing him and drags his body down into his cellar locking him away from the open world. by Mad James

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the woman spend all her time in the kitchen? For fear of her abusive husband.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

what can you say about a midget dressed as a clown? he had a terrible childhood.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey has a very weak cerrebellum.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What do you do when you say shut up to someone and they say make me? Rip out their vocal cords.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Dolly Parton's bobbs are so fake that they both have silicone in them.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did the tide say to the sea?ANSWER-- Long time no sea. LOL Issaiah from OHIO yolo

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did the frog say when he heard his family was dead? "ribbit"

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Not from my wife if that is what you think, but its best people dont know who she is, because you know... A guy that gets many ladies = A playa. A girl that lets his guy do that, well, my wife feels safe about her husband (I am dead honest), but I cant expect people to suddenly go "oh yeah, his wife is totally cool and secure about it all, rather than an insecure idiot that allows him to sleep around like the dog he is) Strictly spoken, I am no dog, women say all men are pigs, but no woman settles for a boy, so that makes me a pig.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Roses are wilting violets are wilting YOU HAD ONE JOB

thumb_up thumb_down -20

okay so one time my dog was eating an octopus tail and i was all like...Bro! octopus are our friends dont eat them! then he was all like okay...so later i saw my goldfish eating a blue kangaroo and i was all like bro blue kangaroos are our friends dont eat them and she was all like okay.. so then i saw my sandwich eating itself and i was like bro...let me eat you instead! and it was like okay. then i saw a bear eating you so i was like bro....thats all i said before it ate both of us :( and thats the story of why i have 6 toes on my left buttcheek

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops